by Letty Watt
My mother’s family kept secrets. My father’s relatives said we had skeletons in the closest. I vowed never to keep family secrets, but now that has changed. I hope it is only a brief time in my life that I hold this secret.
We live four hours from the home town, Norman, Oklahoma where we raised our children and where my husband grew up. His mother who is 90 years old still lives there, as well as our daughter, my sister, and his brother. Now that we are both retired we have decided to move back home. Sadly, we’ve decided not to tell his mother until we find a home to buy, sell ours, and make plans to move. We simply don’t want her to get her hopes up, only to have them dashed as we spend hours house hunting and finding nothing in the area we want, or that meets our present day needs, mainly a one level home with wide hallways. We are secretly planning for an unknown future, when she might live with us, or in our later years when we may need to use a walker or wheelchair.
The secret creates knots in my belly. Normally, I chatter with friends about life and write on my blog about what’s going on, but for the last two months I’ve been inwardly quiet, not able to share with our friends of eighteen years that we will be leaving.
So today we wait. We made an offer on a house two days ago, then drove the long road back to Kansas with our secret. After spending two days during the Christmas holidays house hunting, and the prior three days driving around Norman with our realtor, looking at homes, making notes and dreams, we finally smiled and found two that met our needs. Then like a young couple buying their first home we made the list of what we needed in a home and rated the two. When the count was made the two homes were one point apart. Relief flowed over us as we agreed totally on the new home. Time is passing slowly today as we wait nervously. The couple has a deadline of 5pm tonight to accept our offer.
I’d like to say I’ve not wasted time dreaming of paint colors for the walls or how we’d decorate, but then I’d be lying. I have tossed and turned in my sleep, taken a river cruise up a mountain (in my dreams), doodled in a journal, and today I’ve cleaned all of the ceiling fans, dusted in three rooms, and thought about writing. My husband has tinkered with electronics, and now stands in the garage rearranging tools, puttering around accomplishing little. I’m relieved just to have my fingers typing on keys. Phone….
Letty loves to walk the dog through the field and reflect on life and smile. When she’s not walking, she’s reading, writing, playing golf on warm days or digging in the garden. Her hands are always busy, like her mind.